I just started using Oink and I want to get a good ratio. What do you recommend I do?
I already forwarded my ports and downloaded some newer torrents and leaving them to seed, but I want any other advice from current Oink users.What advice would you get to raise Oink quota?
just keep seeding.
Friday, April 30, 2010
What advice would you give to a 22 year old woman whose partner is confessing to crossdress ?
She is a close friend of mine, being very unhappy at the first moment, but perhaps ready to cope with the problem, looking for more informations and advice.
Sorry, she cannot ask the question herself because she does not write in English.What advice would you give to a 22 year old woman whose partner is confessing to crossdress ?
I'd tell her not to make any hasty decisions or judgements; to learn all she can about crossdressing, and to TALK to her partner, calmly and openly, about what it means to him, or her, and to their relationship.
There's some good basic information here;
http://www.pmpub.com/crossdressingFQA.ht鈥?/a>
which she might find useful.What advice would you give to a 22 year old woman whose partner is confessing to crossdress ?
Though I agree with Valerie in most of her explanations, I think there is a human element she leaves out with her neuroreceptor analogy. Most of us are born with the predisposition due to a hormone wash during gestation which makes it natural not a narcotic.
By partner, I am assuming that they are married. This is no doubt quite a shock to her, and she has every right to be angry. Now she needs to step back and view the situation with this new information in hand.
The cross dressing can be very disturbing to a conservative minded person, and the fact that this has been withheld from her going into the marriaige is a terrible thing to do to someone you purport to love.
If her partner is sincerely sorry about the heartache and grief he has caused by not being upfront with her, then there may be room to salvage this relationship. If the crossdressing is the only flaw in an otherwise great relationship, then she must determine how large of a flaw this is. Is he kind, thoughtful, caring towards her and her feelings? Does he think about her first and show good instincts towards family life? If he's abusive and uncaring and has a few other fatal flaws, then this is just the straw that breaks the camels back
If he is the man she has always desired, then his mistake, not hers, was not trusting the woman he loves with his deepest, most raw secret.
She needs to learn about crossdressing (information, not exposure), what it is and what it is not. Then she needs to decide what level of exposure she is comfortable with and he needs to abide by that level. This is not negotiable at this point, he needs to be respectful of her and show her that he has earned the right, and she has become comfortable with his crossdressing to allow herself more exposure to it.
She may not want him to crossdress around her or thier kids (whether they have them now or later). She may allow him to dress when no one is around or just in the bedroom between the two of them.
This is NOT a slap to her beauty, or a complaint about her femininity. This is NOT her fault, but it is something that she must come to grips with. The man she loves, has a feminine side that he expresses through dressing. As long as he understands HER feelings and needs, this does not need to be a make or break situation.
Tell her that most crossdressers are straight heterosexual men with one little kink. Their brains are hard-wired such that it releases serotonin and other neurotransmitters when they crossdress. This gives them a sensation of well-being, pleasure, sexual gratification and self-identity. It also affects the reward center of their brains, so it mimics an addiction reaction.
Crossdressing can become a serious problem in a marriage. In order for the marriage to continue happily then the partners need to be prepared to make some compromises. They need to recognize each others needs. He has a need to crossdress, she has a need to be loved by a man. He has to recognize that she is the most important thing in his life. His wife is more important to him than his crossdressing habit.
She needs to prepare a list of rules that she can tolerate. He needs to understand that he needs to place limits on his crossdressing. She may insist that the crossdressing be kept private, not before friends, family or children. She may also insist that the crossdressing be kept out of their intimate times, after all it is a real turn-off for her. Other rules may include frequency, times, or styles, (nothing vile, sexy, or disgusting) keep it in good tastes. In any case, they need to work on the rules together and be prepared to make compromises. She should try to learn as much about crossdressing as she can. Where possible she should help him with his feminine style and look.
Tell her to take self-defense classes and learn to protect herself. Seriously, that's one of the best things ANY person can do... Cross-dressers are frequent targets of violence, so every little bit helps.
Other than that, give her a hug, tell her to stay strong and never give up on who she really, no matter what other people might say.
Good luck.
First of all, I would advise her to not view this as a ';problem'; that she needs to ';cope'; with. This is really an opportunity for her and her partner to become closer. It's very difficult for many men and women to ever truly be both ';friends'; and lovers. But the fact that her partner is a crossdresser gives them an opportunity to add an extra dimension to their relationship, with a mutual interest in apparel and possibly makeup, jewelry, etc.
Tell her to explore and enjoy.
to confess to cross-dress is believe that wrong thing (from religious view) shouldn't happen. Ask him if he thinks that your relation is a mistake which should stop. If so; it's your decision to break. otherwise don't worry
I think,,no big deal,, crossdressers are usually straight men,,so it doesn't mean he is gay or bi,,just means that somewhere in his mind of likes and dislikes ,,he enjoys things that are usually meant for women to wear,, if she loves him,, just go with it,, this isn't the dark ages,, let him express himself openly,,if she doesn't he will just hide it . What happens in private is no ones business. Tell her to try to have fun with it,,and maybe both will enjoy each others fantasies.
goodluck,,
There's nothing wrong with cross-dressing. It does not hurt anyone, it does not cause any harm. Why should she worry?
well being the crossdresser in the relationship, i can say that i have had no luck at all, any woman i have been with long enough to trust with that information has pretty much just freaked out, called me some nasty names and left. so my first advise would be to avoid doing any of those things. frankly i don't see why it is that big of a deal women crossdress all the time and nobody say squat to them. and it would seem to me that women would like a guy that likes to shop, and do other girly things. lastly most crossdressers are not gay we just like your clothes.
Tell your friend to look past the crossdressing, Think of why they were together in the first place. Does he still have the qualities that attracted her. Learn why he does it. I had a boyfrend who crossdressed, he was a good guy and could pass as an attractive woman. We had alot of fun. Plus its always nice to have someone around who can tell you how your makeup looks. Just remember he needs his fem time and your friend will need his manly time there needs to be balance
To begin with she should be flattered that he trusts her enough to tell her.
There are many reasons why a guy does this. It could be he gets a sexual thrill from it and would dress for sex.
It could be that being feminine is a release from the pressures of masculine life.
It can also be because there is more choice in female clothing and it feels good.
He may on the other hand be transgendered. If this is the case and he tells her then that is a different situation.
She needs to understand that there is often a transition period for guys who cross dress. The more they do it often the more they need to do it. Then going out will be the next stage. Not all men who dress as a girl in public are transgendered.
He may not understand why he wants to do it until he has been there.
It's harmless, and it's private. She should not be telling anyone about it, because that will only embarrass him. Tell her to get over it.
if she love him , its a samll thing
If her partner loves her, then he's probably just a transvestite.
The difference between a transvestite and a drag queen is orientation. He's probably just a transvestite and is nothing to worry about.
He's probably just enamored by all that is femanine.
I know it's weird, but it's really nothing to worry about.
Sorry, she cannot ask the question herself because she does not write in English.What advice would you give to a 22 year old woman whose partner is confessing to crossdress ?
I'd tell her not to make any hasty decisions or judgements; to learn all she can about crossdressing, and to TALK to her partner, calmly and openly, about what it means to him, or her, and to their relationship.
There's some good basic information here;
http://www.pmpub.com/crossdressingFQA.ht鈥?/a>
which she might find useful.What advice would you give to a 22 year old woman whose partner is confessing to crossdress ?
Though I agree with Valerie in most of her explanations, I think there is a human element she leaves out with her neuroreceptor analogy. Most of us are born with the predisposition due to a hormone wash during gestation which makes it natural not a narcotic.
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By partner, I am assuming that they are married. This is no doubt quite a shock to her, and she has every right to be angry. Now she needs to step back and view the situation with this new information in hand.
The cross dressing can be very disturbing to a conservative minded person, and the fact that this has been withheld from her going into the marriaige is a terrible thing to do to someone you purport to love.
If her partner is sincerely sorry about the heartache and grief he has caused by not being upfront with her, then there may be room to salvage this relationship. If the crossdressing is the only flaw in an otherwise great relationship, then she must determine how large of a flaw this is. Is he kind, thoughtful, caring towards her and her feelings? Does he think about her first and show good instincts towards family life? If he's abusive and uncaring and has a few other fatal flaws, then this is just the straw that breaks the camels back
If he is the man she has always desired, then his mistake, not hers, was not trusting the woman he loves with his deepest, most raw secret.
She needs to learn about crossdressing (information, not exposure), what it is and what it is not. Then she needs to decide what level of exposure she is comfortable with and he needs to abide by that level. This is not negotiable at this point, he needs to be respectful of her and show her that he has earned the right, and she has become comfortable with his crossdressing to allow herself more exposure to it.
She may not want him to crossdress around her or thier kids (whether they have them now or later). She may allow him to dress when no one is around or just in the bedroom between the two of them.
This is NOT a slap to her beauty, or a complaint about her femininity. This is NOT her fault, but it is something that she must come to grips with. The man she loves, has a feminine side that he expresses through dressing. As long as he understands HER feelings and needs, this does not need to be a make or break situation.
Tell her that most crossdressers are straight heterosexual men with one little kink. Their brains are hard-wired such that it releases serotonin and other neurotransmitters when they crossdress. This gives them a sensation of well-being, pleasure, sexual gratification and self-identity. It also affects the reward center of their brains, so it mimics an addiction reaction.
Crossdressing can become a serious problem in a marriage. In order for the marriage to continue happily then the partners need to be prepared to make some compromises. They need to recognize each others needs. He has a need to crossdress, she has a need to be loved by a man. He has to recognize that she is the most important thing in his life. His wife is more important to him than his crossdressing habit.
She needs to prepare a list of rules that she can tolerate. He needs to understand that he needs to place limits on his crossdressing. She may insist that the crossdressing be kept private, not before friends, family or children. She may also insist that the crossdressing be kept out of their intimate times, after all it is a real turn-off for her. Other rules may include frequency, times, or styles, (nothing vile, sexy, or disgusting) keep it in good tastes. In any case, they need to work on the rules together and be prepared to make compromises. She should try to learn as much about crossdressing as she can. Where possible she should help him with his feminine style and look.
Tell her to take self-defense classes and learn to protect herself. Seriously, that's one of the best things ANY person can do... Cross-dressers are frequent targets of violence, so every little bit helps.
Other than that, give her a hug, tell her to stay strong and never give up on who she really, no matter what other people might say.
Good luck.
First of all, I would advise her to not view this as a ';problem'; that she needs to ';cope'; with. This is really an opportunity for her and her partner to become closer. It's very difficult for many men and women to ever truly be both ';friends'; and lovers. But the fact that her partner is a crossdresser gives them an opportunity to add an extra dimension to their relationship, with a mutual interest in apparel and possibly makeup, jewelry, etc.
Tell her to explore and enjoy.
to confess to cross-dress is believe that wrong thing (from religious view) shouldn't happen. Ask him if he thinks that your relation is a mistake which should stop. If so; it's your decision to break. otherwise don't worry
I think,,no big deal,, crossdressers are usually straight men,,so it doesn't mean he is gay or bi,,just means that somewhere in his mind of likes and dislikes ,,he enjoys things that are usually meant for women to wear,, if she loves him,, just go with it,, this isn't the dark ages,, let him express himself openly,,if she doesn't he will just hide it . What happens in private is no ones business. Tell her to try to have fun with it,,and maybe both will enjoy each others fantasies.
goodluck,,
There's nothing wrong with cross-dressing. It does not hurt anyone, it does not cause any harm. Why should she worry?
well being the crossdresser in the relationship, i can say that i have had no luck at all, any woman i have been with long enough to trust with that information has pretty much just freaked out, called me some nasty names and left. so my first advise would be to avoid doing any of those things. frankly i don't see why it is that big of a deal women crossdress all the time and nobody say squat to them. and it would seem to me that women would like a guy that likes to shop, and do other girly things. lastly most crossdressers are not gay we just like your clothes.
Tell your friend to look past the crossdressing, Think of why they were together in the first place. Does he still have the qualities that attracted her. Learn why he does it. I had a boyfrend who crossdressed, he was a good guy and could pass as an attractive woman. We had alot of fun. Plus its always nice to have someone around who can tell you how your makeup looks. Just remember he needs his fem time and your friend will need his manly time there needs to be balance
To begin with she should be flattered that he trusts her enough to tell her.
There are many reasons why a guy does this. It could be he gets a sexual thrill from it and would dress for sex.
It could be that being feminine is a release from the pressures of masculine life.
It can also be because there is more choice in female clothing and it feels good.
He may on the other hand be transgendered. If this is the case and he tells her then that is a different situation.
She needs to understand that there is often a transition period for guys who cross dress. The more they do it often the more they need to do it. Then going out will be the next stage. Not all men who dress as a girl in public are transgendered.
He may not understand why he wants to do it until he has been there.
It's harmless, and it's private. She should not be telling anyone about it, because that will only embarrass him. Tell her to get over it.
if she love him , its a samll thing
If her partner loves her, then he's probably just a transvestite.
The difference between a transvestite and a drag queen is orientation. He's probably just a transvestite and is nothing to worry about.
He's probably just enamored by all that is femanine.
I know it's weird, but it's really nothing to worry about.
Need girl advice: Another girl checking out your man and ignoring you, what would you do?
What would you do if this girl (you don't know her from before) at an event shows your man a lot of attention and eye contact but totally ignoring you. Let's say your hubby does not pay her so much attention. Do you get bothered by her ignoring you and hunting for your man? Is there anything one can do?
What do you usually do?Need girl advice: Another girl checking out your man and ignoring you, what would you do?
Oh oh... sounds like I hear a very very jealous girl asking this question. Girl, I'm a guy, but I understand how you feel and what you're really feeling is called, ';Insecurity.';
My advice, let it go. Have faith and trust in your hubby who is only with you and ONLY you. You will know if he is faithful too... depending on how much he trusts you.
There's nothing you can do but learn to control your 'emotional jealousy'. Usually, as human beings, our emotions get the best of us. I think that's what you're going through. Don't get second thoughts about what this girl is going to do. Don't be overprotective with your hubby by snarling and hissing at this girl.
Trust me, if everything falls into place, then your hubby knows he only loves you.Need girl advice: Another girl checking out your man and ignoring you, what would you do?
some girls are totally sl*ts..
they don't care about that a man is still in relation and doesn't seem single..
they know the eye game..
and they can seek attention of your man..
and of course, she will ignore you..
what you can do is..
stay close to your man..
and don't let him see here and there..
be so much funny and attention seeking that he didn't even bothered to see here and there..
look dear, sl*ts are everywhere..
you have to save you man and your relationship from them
Good Luck
:)
I can't tell you how many times this has happened to me. My husband is pretty good looking. There have been a couple of times that we've gone to this one restaraunt and the waitress (that somehow always ends up with our table) will completely ignore me, tough my husband, and only get his order. He has to order for ME.
Here's what I did: Just pretend that YOU don't notice her and each time she ';interrupts';, don't act like it's a big deal. I actually told my hubby that I found it ';flattering'; and that won me more brownie points for not being a jealous shrew. Just let it roll, you know who he's going home with!
First of all he is not ';your'; man he is ';a'; man. Stop being so possessive.
Secondly, he loves you enough to put a ring on your finger, not just his finger in your ring.
Be confident in that love, and if some girl is interested in him, just be proud he still looks good enough to get new attention. You must be with a hottie, so congratulations.
well this type of thing pulled a bunch of my Friends apart,
first find out a little bit about her, she might just be a very friendly (whore-ish), girl(what happened in my experience)
if not dont make a big deal of it because you will come off as looking controlling and jealous.
just make shure he doesnt pay TOO much attention back to her and you should be ok
hope this helps
-Howard
I would SNAP!!!! I would make myself be heard.
And if she kept it up, I'd take her *** outside. ***** can look @ my fist in her eye or my boot in her face. that's just me.
you gotta stand up for yourself, claim what's yours
id be bothered by it just tell her to back off
You can't start fights just becuz someone looked , stared or said ';hi'; with a smile to your hubby.
If they are doing something you can step in
hell yeah i would be bothered. not because she's ignoring him byt because she obviously likes him. Throw her an evil look !!!!!!
~ Kiss my husband while she is trying to flirt (so she is sure he is with someone) then ignore it. Take it as a compliment. ~
if my boyfriend was buying her flirtyness I could kick both of their butts
If he isn't and takes no notice, I would leave her alone :)
WHEN SHES AROUND BE EXTRA LOVING TO UR MAN LET THE ***** KNO HES MINES AND HES OFF LIMITS
Do NOTHING, self confidence is the best revenge :)
punch the ***** in the face
tell her that your man aint interested in a slut like her,n tell her to beat it
well from what you said yes i would be annoyed! just tell her to back off
ur husband should ignore her... and walk away
Never paly a game when u are not sure how to..
What do you usually do?Need girl advice: Another girl checking out your man and ignoring you, what would you do?
Oh oh... sounds like I hear a very very jealous girl asking this question. Girl, I'm a guy, but I understand how you feel and what you're really feeling is called, ';Insecurity.';
My advice, let it go. Have faith and trust in your hubby who is only with you and ONLY you. You will know if he is faithful too... depending on how much he trusts you.
There's nothing you can do but learn to control your 'emotional jealousy'. Usually, as human beings, our emotions get the best of us. I think that's what you're going through. Don't get second thoughts about what this girl is going to do. Don't be overprotective with your hubby by snarling and hissing at this girl.
Trust me, if everything falls into place, then your hubby knows he only loves you.Need girl advice: Another girl checking out your man and ignoring you, what would you do?
some girls are totally sl*ts..
they don't care about that a man is still in relation and doesn't seem single..
they know the eye game..
and they can seek attention of your man..
and of course, she will ignore you..
what you can do is..
stay close to your man..
and don't let him see here and there..
be so much funny and attention seeking that he didn't even bothered to see here and there..
look dear, sl*ts are everywhere..
you have to save you man and your relationship from them
Good Luck
:)
I can't tell you how many times this has happened to me. My husband is pretty good looking. There have been a couple of times that we've gone to this one restaraunt and the waitress (that somehow always ends up with our table) will completely ignore me, tough my husband, and only get his order. He has to order for ME.
Here's what I did: Just pretend that YOU don't notice her and each time she ';interrupts';, don't act like it's a big deal. I actually told my hubby that I found it ';flattering'; and that won me more brownie points for not being a jealous shrew. Just let it roll, you know who he's going home with!
First of all he is not ';your'; man he is ';a'; man. Stop being so possessive.
Secondly, he loves you enough to put a ring on your finger, not just his finger in your ring.
Be confident in that love, and if some girl is interested in him, just be proud he still looks good enough to get new attention. You must be with a hottie, so congratulations.
well this type of thing pulled a bunch of my Friends apart,
first find out a little bit about her, she might just be a very friendly (whore-ish), girl(what happened in my experience)
if not dont make a big deal of it because you will come off as looking controlling and jealous.
just make shure he doesnt pay TOO much attention back to her and you should be ok
hope this helps
-Howard
I would SNAP!!!! I would make myself be heard.
And if she kept it up, I'd take her *** outside. ***** can look @ my fist in her eye or my boot in her face. that's just me.
you gotta stand up for yourself, claim what's yours
id be bothered by it just tell her to back off
You can't start fights just becuz someone looked , stared or said ';hi'; with a smile to your hubby.
If they are doing something you can step in
hell yeah i would be bothered. not because she's ignoring him byt because she obviously likes him. Throw her an evil look !!!!!!
~ Kiss my husband while she is trying to flirt (so she is sure he is with someone) then ignore it. Take it as a compliment. ~
if my boyfriend was buying her flirtyness I could kick both of their butts
If he isn't and takes no notice, I would leave her alone :)
WHEN SHES AROUND BE EXTRA LOVING TO UR MAN LET THE ***** KNO HES MINES AND HES OFF LIMITS
Do NOTHING, self confidence is the best revenge :)
punch the ***** in the face
tell her that your man aint interested in a slut like her,n tell her to beat it
well from what you said yes i would be annoyed! just tell her to back off
ur husband should ignore her... and walk away
Never paly a game when u are not sure how to..
I'm going to study abroad this semester and I would like to know if you have any advice or tips?
How will your Semester at Sea voyage create (or enhance) your personal global perspective? Highlight your discussion by referencing at least one country on your itinerary and by explaining how your time there will further develop your awareness.
What are your academic goals, and how will Semester at Sea help you to you achieve them? Include at least two examples.I'm going to study abroad this semester and I would like to know if you have any advice or tips?
Hey,
Although I shouldn't be doing your homework for you here's some ideas, lol. Venturing abroad to study allows you as an individual to obtain an international perspective on society. It allows you to view various cultures around the world through cultural relativism (meaning for what they are worth), rather then through an ethnocentric mindset. You're able to witness and understand foreign education and the importance of certain civic issues. Certain cities such as London, the largest in most populated in Europe, is the epitome of a melting pot, with numerous individuals coming from different religions and cultural backgrounds. This immediate surrounding enables you to develop your awareness of these people and so forth.
Hope this helps!I'm going to study abroad this semester and I would like to know if you have any advice or tips?
It looks like you need help writing a paper to be accepted to a semester at sea program, not tips about what to expect. That's ok, but be upfront about it.
What are your academic goals, and how will Semester at Sea help you to you achieve them? Include at least two examples.I'm going to study abroad this semester and I would like to know if you have any advice or tips?
Hey,
Although I shouldn't be doing your homework for you here's some ideas, lol. Venturing abroad to study allows you as an individual to obtain an international perspective on society. It allows you to view various cultures around the world through cultural relativism (meaning for what they are worth), rather then through an ethnocentric mindset. You're able to witness and understand foreign education and the importance of certain civic issues. Certain cities such as London, the largest in most populated in Europe, is the epitome of a melting pot, with numerous individuals coming from different religions and cultural backgrounds. This immediate surrounding enables you to develop your awareness of these people and so forth.
Hope this helps!I'm going to study abroad this semester and I would like to know if you have any advice or tips?
It looks like you need help writing a paper to be accepted to a semester at sea program, not tips about what to expect. That's ok, but be upfront about it.
How do you feel about your divorce, and what advice would you give?
For example, is there anything you wish you had done differently at all?How do you feel about your divorce, and what advice would you give?
Don't get Married for a Kid =) young%26amp;dumb...
My son is happy.
Her and I get along way better when I only see her a few times a week
=)How do you feel about your divorce, and what advice would you give?
It's not the answer to somethings and yet it maybe the answer to everything. One should really think about this before you sign the paper to go through with it. Never make a snap choice think it through when you have children that will be affected by it. If you really can't seem to make things work and you have tried for a period of time. You may find yourself sitting in front of an attorney. The real difference for women are by they time they are in front of that attorney she has already accepted the fact the marriage is over. The man on the other hand will feel it as the marriage is final and over he will start to feel the loss. Never talk down the mate who has left and your children will have an easier time of it. If you talk down the mate your children will lean to that mate because he feels you are being mean to that mate. Sometimes the marriage ends out no caring for each other, its no one fault and no one should be guilty. It happens., its hard on kids so be careful of how you handle it.
nope, not really, I wouldn't change much.
advice: be fair, don't use it as a forum to get back at each other, you should both move on with your lives , and you can't do that while you're stabbing each other in the back.
Take what you brought into it and split what you got together. If it was a 1 income household, sit down and figure out how to get the other to the point where they can maintain a household on their own (be that , school, alimony, getting a job,new career whatever..be creative if you have to). But be fair.
Do not , under any circumstances , no matter what..use your kids as pawns or even use them as counsellors..they do not need to hear that crap! I don't care what your ex did, does,etc. doesn't matter. it's still their mom or dad.
Do talk to them and get them counselling if they need it, and have a united front for them. Don't put them in the middle of any fights!
My divorce caused my downfall even after I remarried. I became emotionally lonely and have low self esteem and not 'myself ' anymore till now.
I should have gone to a counsellor..and forgiven him even there were lots of his doings were unforgivable.
My advise:
Think of his ';possitives';, forgive him and go to a marriage counsellor together. ';Never say never';. Try all avenues first.
sweetie if i had it to do all over again i would never have done it, i had a really good wife and mother of my kids, i threw 23 yrs right out the window, but i didnt see it that way then, so im sitting here all alone, and let me tell u it gets lonley, i have dated but the women are not interested in love anymore, they all want to have a relationship thats open, to where they can come and go with whomever they chose, my advise is to work it out if possible, make the changes u have to and accept the ones that caint be changed as long as they are not like cheating and lieing, it comes back home to u later on, and hits u pretty hard, and by then its to late
I wish I had hunted him and his play toy down and beat both their a@@@..Regret that. .threw 20 years of marriage down the toliet..I wish I had set his new car on fire..there I feel better...
Now, 27 years later, I wish I would have known about Bird Nest custody.preventing blackheads
Don't get Married for a Kid =) young%26amp;dumb...
My son is happy.
Her and I get along way better when I only see her a few times a week
=)How do you feel about your divorce, and what advice would you give?
It's not the answer to somethings and yet it maybe the answer to everything. One should really think about this before you sign the paper to go through with it. Never make a snap choice think it through when you have children that will be affected by it. If you really can't seem to make things work and you have tried for a period of time. You may find yourself sitting in front of an attorney. The real difference for women are by they time they are in front of that attorney she has already accepted the fact the marriage is over. The man on the other hand will feel it as the marriage is final and over he will start to feel the loss. Never talk down the mate who has left and your children will have an easier time of it. If you talk down the mate your children will lean to that mate because he feels you are being mean to that mate. Sometimes the marriage ends out no caring for each other, its no one fault and no one should be guilty. It happens., its hard on kids so be careful of how you handle it.
nope, not really, I wouldn't change much.
advice: be fair, don't use it as a forum to get back at each other, you should both move on with your lives , and you can't do that while you're stabbing each other in the back.
Take what you brought into it and split what you got together. If it was a 1 income household, sit down and figure out how to get the other to the point where they can maintain a household on their own (be that , school, alimony, getting a job,new career whatever..be creative if you have to). But be fair.
Do not , under any circumstances , no matter what..use your kids as pawns or even use them as counsellors..they do not need to hear that crap! I don't care what your ex did, does,etc. doesn't matter. it's still their mom or dad.
Do talk to them and get them counselling if they need it, and have a united front for them. Don't put them in the middle of any fights!
My divorce caused my downfall even after I remarried. I became emotionally lonely and have low self esteem and not 'myself ' anymore till now.
I should have gone to a counsellor..and forgiven him even there were lots of his doings were unforgivable.
My advise:
Think of his ';possitives';, forgive him and go to a marriage counsellor together. ';Never say never';. Try all avenues first.
sweetie if i had it to do all over again i would never have done it, i had a really good wife and mother of my kids, i threw 23 yrs right out the window, but i didnt see it that way then, so im sitting here all alone, and let me tell u it gets lonley, i have dated but the women are not interested in love anymore, they all want to have a relationship thats open, to where they can come and go with whomever they chose, my advise is to work it out if possible, make the changes u have to and accept the ones that caint be changed as long as they are not like cheating and lieing, it comes back home to u later on, and hits u pretty hard, and by then its to late
I wish I had hunted him and his play toy down and beat both their a@@@..Regret that. .threw 20 years of marriage down the toliet..I wish I had set his new car on fire..there I feel better...
Now, 27 years later, I wish I would have known about Bird Nest custody.
Is good advice confirmation of what you already know?
The question applies to the question.Is good advice confirmation of what you already know?
good advice might be confirmation of what you already know...
just a different way of approaching a situation.
or good advice can sometimes present a new way of looking at a situation that you might not have thought of.
good advice should always be positive and beneficial to you.
good advice might be confirmation of what you already know...
just a different way of approaching a situation.
or good advice can sometimes present a new way of looking at a situation that you might not have thought of.
good advice should always be positive and beneficial to you.
What is the best design for this organization you advice ?
I constructed my small business company, and now I am designing the internal system of it... Please advice me with the best model for an export based company, starting up....including a breif job description ..What is the best design for this organization you advice ?
Sorry have no ideal, wish I could help.
Sorry have no ideal, wish I could help.
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